Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Severely Condemning derogatory ad on men

Save Indian Family Foundation, strongly and severely condemns the Derogatory Ad being telecast at the behest of Kitply Industries. The ad shows a young timid man getting married to a woman and on the first night the bed crumbles. The wife asks the husband, “Kitply nahi laye kya?” (Have you not bought Kitply?) and slaps the husband.

Openly, brazenly and cold – bloodedly this ad not only depicts Domestic Violence on men but also promulgates it, inspiring women to do it and telling men that this is a way of life. World over international studies have proved it beyond doubt that Domestic Violence is not a gender specific issue and is a matter of equal concern for both men and women.

The situation is far worse in India wherein gender biased, lopsided, avaricious, pernicious, draconian, anachronous and unconstitutional anti – male marital laws fail to recognize the presence of Domestic Violence and acknowledge the same for men. Yes, Domestic Violence laws in India do not consider the fact that men too could be victims of Domestic Violence the way women are presumed and prejudiced to be and the Domestic Violence law in India does not allow men to make complaints of Domestic Violence in India.

This despite the fact holding true that as per Government records i.e. suicide date published by National Crime Records Bureau, every year 56, 000 married men are committing suicide which is considered as a social service in a great country like India, where 82 % of taxes are paid by men. Neither do men have a Men Welfare Ministry for them nor a National Commission for Men to look into their grievances, whereas animals do have. The condition of Indian men is worse than animals in India.

To add to the woes men are subject to the constant fear of being dragged into false cases of dowry harassment and domestic violence draining them financially, socially, morally and spiritually in addition to being victims of Domestic Violence as well at the hands of their vindictive and vicious wives and in – laws who do not forget to file false cases of dowry harassment on the innocent men and their families and drag them to police station and court and unleash Legal Terrorism on them and extort money legally from them.

As if all this was no less, when corporates like Kitply Industries rain on men and promote Domestic Violence on men as a norm and when confronted for the same, shamelessly claim that it has been shown in a humorous mood, and shrug away from accountability. The contention that the ad was shown in a light spirit is subject to critical analysis and not becoming of a brand name Kitply Industries.

Save Indian Family Foundation, the single largest umbrella NGO for about 15 different NGOs fighting not only for men’s rights but also for Gender Equality and Family Harmony, severely condemns such derogatory ads and demands apology from Kitply Industries, failing which Save Indian Family Foundation will be forced to issue legal notices to them to respond properly.

One can only imagine the kind of euphoria that would have been generated if they had shown a man slapping a woman in similar manner. So when activists championing the cause of Equality for Women are crying foul, why are they now silent when Gender Equality is critically endangered and its existence seriously jeopardized with such derogatory ad content. This only depicts the hollow goals with which such activists work and want to rake in the mullah in the name of Women Empowerment and feminism but do not believe in actual equality based on truth and justice.

Save Indian Family Foundation re – iterates its demand of an apology from Kitply Industries and once again puts this question to the civil society and the government that how long are they continuing to consider men as second class citizens in their own country?

Alimony - The Trojan Horse of Matrimony

Irony defining life it seems has become a norm in today’s times. And it does not seem to spare the most controversial social institution, working as first step towards familial life, aka the INDIAN MARRIAGE. The irony here is that what starts as a pompous celebration and extravagant spending ends with financially, emotionally and spiritually draining litigation with mud – slinging from both sides aka the DIVORCE. And ending a marriage is very costly for a man, not only of because the fear of false cases of dowry harassment and domestic violence against him but also as he is liable to pay alimony or maintenance pedante lite to his wife.

The concept of alimony, although was designed with a noble intention of prevention of stranded and protection of destitute non – earning spouse, the same has increasingly become the single largest motivating factor for girls to break their marriages at the slightest sneeze of discomfiture in the relationship with their husbands. And in order to gain a beneficial and an empowered bargaining position in the negotiation for alimony they even do not refrain from filing false cases of Dowry Harassment against their husbands and in – laws and getting them arrested to plant fear in their mind to make them succumb to their heavy demands of alimony.

Thus, in today’s dynamic socio – economic scenario, alimony has become the Trojan Horse of matrimony. Girls know it very well that the moment they start losing control in the marriage or over their husband they can always walk out of it by entangling the husband in false cases of dowry harassment and domestic violence and harassing him so much that he agrees to pay the heavy ransom girls demand to release him from the forced slavery and give him the costly freedom called divorce.

Was ever alimony in divorce meant to be an easy route to tax – free money? Never. But with the existing rampant corruption amongst the police, judiciary and the legal system, men are made to pay heavy alimonies to their estranged wives for settling the false cases and everyone involved in the settlement gets a share of the pie. The practice is thriving like a flourishing business which is so anti – male in nature that every year 56, 000 married men are committing suicide, unable to bear the brunt of fallacy called, The Bad Marriage.

As its definition stands, alimony is subsistence – allowance which allows a non – capable spouse to maintain oneself post divorce. Spouses who are earning or are capable of earning based on their qualifications are not entitled to alimony. One might contend by the above definition that for working women / substantially educated women opting for divorce, as they are not entitled to alimony, their husbands need not worry, but it will be imperative to state here that increasing number of such cases are coming forth where either women have hidden the income and the fact that they earn or deliberately left job to squander money from husband.

Even if the woman is not able to maintain herself, then more than the husband, the parents of the woman are a greater culprit for not properly empowering their daughter with proper education and making her dependent on someone else, expecting that the marriage of their daughter with that person will last for eternity. And is it not the daughter’s right in her ancestral property, her legitimate due that she should get? Why are girl’s parents shrugging away from this responsibility of theirs and discriminating between a daughter and a son when distribution of wealth comes into picture? Why is it expected that only the husband is responsible to maintain the woman even when they are not staying together? Why the girl’s parents are not held responsible for such a condition of their daughter? Will the civil society at least think over these questions if not answer them?

NCW caught red handed speaking lies

National Commission of Women (NCW) needs to be banned for its unethical activities.



1) They openly support adulterous women by claiming them as victims and seek amendments to grant maintenance to adulterous women.

2) They openly say, DO NOT BELIEVE THE MEDIA REPORTS.

3) They openly speak white lies as depicted below in the mail conversation between them. Read on.





Would the NCW like to clarify what does it mean by harsh?



1) Sending innocent mothers and sisters on the basis of an unverified complaint is not harsh?



2) Shielding 56, 000 husband killers is not harsh?



3) Fudging statistics to get foreign funds for implementing anti - family, avaricious, pernicious, draconian, anachronous, anti - male laws and unleashing them unto the society is not harsh?



4) Openly protecting the rights of adulterous, promiscuous women is not harsh?



5) Demanding multiple maintenance from males under pretext of false allegations is not harsh?, And last but not the least.



6) Turning away old mothers tortured by their unscrupulous daughter - in - laws and her parents is not harsh, saying this does not come under their ambit?



WILL THE NCW ANSWER?



And what realities they are talking of, why don’t they come out in public if they are so astute, devout and sincere?



with regard to your queries you are hereby informed that

1. that NCW does not send innocent mothers and sisters on the basis of an unverified complaint to jails we dont have such power in the first place

2. that the NCW does offer support to women in distress which may also include sisters and mothers and just daughter in laws therefore your presumptions on NCW is factually misleading

3. we do not fudge statistics the staistics are manintained by NCRB and not by NCW

4. ncw has not protected the rights of adulterous women i do not know from where you have gathered such information please do not beleive in media reports

5. we have not ever turned away old mothers etc any women requiring help is provided be it a mother sister or daufghter in law any one requiring assitance can approach us

6. we do not distinguish or categorise in fact you would be surprised to note that the NCW recommendations on implementation of Dowry related acts is that first and foremost resort to counselling and mediation with intention to save the marriage and family and only where a prima facie case exists then the legal recourse is to be taken to

any more queries ???

yogesh mehta

law officer

1) Then why has the NCW not taken any action for the 1, 20, 000 women arrested from 2004 -2007 on a mere FIR? Does NCW consider it right? Does it not consider it should make a move to protect those mothers and sisters who are harassed by police before being tried or convicted? Just answer Yes or NO.



2) Can NCW give me the statistics of the number of women as mothers and sisters it has helped vis - a vis the number of daughter - in - laws it has helped? Just answer Yes or NO. Does NCW maintain such categorized information. Just answer Yes or NO. If not reasons.



3) If you do not fudge statistics, then how did NCW made a claim that 70 % women are denied maintenance on adultery grounds and later when asked to publish source data for it, categorically denied having such information. News link. Do you consider this as fudging of statistics. Just answer Yes or NO. NCW Supporting Adultery. See Link1



4) It is the same media reports based on which you keep shouting on violence on women. And now that I have official email from NCW telling me not to believe media reports. Let the media also know about it. If NCW does not protect the rights of adulterous women by making propositions to remove the adultery clause in maintenance. Do you think this is not supporting adulterous women. Just answer Yes or NO.



5) I would like you to provide me details to convince me how many cases have you have resolved with mediation and how many women other than wives have been genuinely helped by NCW.



PS: We, at Save Indian Family Foundation do not consider the advice to file a case as genuine help as it does not help either. So answer keeping this note in mind.



1) It has been brought to NCW’s notice several times thro’ media. And now also I am bringing it to your notice. What can you do for them? Or better what can you do to prevent such mishaps in future?



2) So categorically NCW cannot substantiate its claim of having supported mothers and sisters?



3) Some cases?? How many judgments do you have? The article makes no mention of that. And when NCW was sent an RTI application for data supporting the claim that in 70 % of cases, women are denied maintenance for adultery why did the NCW reply that it does not maintain such information. If the NCW does not maintain such information, why was it published in Media and if the information was not given by NCW why has NCW not taken action against the tabloid for printing information without approval. This means NCW has got the information published and then later denied having source of that information. Do you consider its ethical on part of NCW to behave in such a manner. I want an answer in YES or NO.



4) “NCW also sought another significant amendment to Section 125, saying that said adultery should no longer be a ground for denying maintenance to a woman. ”



This is from the article. Still you say NCW has not made such a claim and repeat it as well? Are you not writing white lies?? At least make some background research before writing an email. You are being watched by 15, 000 members. And on a discussion note, I would like to know why does NCW consider adultery should be made a civil offense? Adultery in a relationship tantamount to breach of trust. What makes NCW think per se that it is a civil offense and why should a woman be provided maintenance who has walked out of the relationship.



5) Read my point number 5 then revert back. I have asked for some information.



6) Oh sure I will, you do not worry about that.